Koalas Aren’t Hard They Some Little Bitches.
“This essay was written by an 8th grader in Pittsburgh in the spring of 2004. The assignment was to pick an enangered species, and explain why it’s important to save it. The typos and formatting are preserved from the original.”
I shouldn’t do shit. I don’t care about them they all could die and it won’t affect my life. I know a lot about them but I don’t need to think about them. They’re just a waste of time koalas are stupid they don’t help me with shit so why should I help them. If they all die there will be more room for the panthers and all the other hard animals. Koalas are weak a pit will get rid of their whole fucking family. That’s why I don’t like koalas.
Koalas have sharp claws but they are weak. They all small and fat and they be climing trees. I hope a storm just come while theyjust chilling up in the tree thinking they is hard and they’re will all just fall off. They just break they neck and shit. When they fall they claws are going to fall off and they going to be crying like some little bitches.
Koalas aren’t hard they some little bitches. They start climbing up the tree soon as they see a deer from like 50feet away…
Aaron wrote:
This is pretty much the best essay ever.
“They all small and fat and they be climing trees.”
Posted on 21-Jul-07 at 6:06 am | Permalink
claire wrote:
Word.
Posted on 21-Jul-07 at 8:13 am | Permalink
john weeks wrote:
shit is dope ,y’all. mutherfucker be tellin it, Goddammit!
maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan, fuck pandas!
Posted on 21-Jul-07 at 6:12 pm | Permalink
AHB wrote:
Sad.
Posted on 21-Jul-07 at 7:04 pm | Permalink
AH wrote:
He might change his mind after he had one attack him or shred him to bits while running up him and using him like a tree. They look cute’n'cuddly, but can be ferocious little buggers!!
One word for the essay - scary!! LOL
Posted on 22-Jul-07 at 10:21 pm | Permalink
Tim wrote:
A great example of where we’ve come over the last 100 years. Check out this example of an 8th grade exam from 1895. http://teacherlingo.com/blogs/bettyb/archive/2007/07/21/eighth-grade-education.aspx
We haven’t always produced stupid children.
Posted on 23-Jul-07 at 3:00 pm | Permalink
chas bowie wrote:
Tim—
To be fair, I know for a fact that there are some brilliant 8th graders in our school system at this very moment, and I also have to presume that there were more than a few less-than-bright kids a hundred years ago.
Still—that’s one tough test.
Chas
Posted on 23-Jul-07 at 3:27 pm | Permalink
Katelyn wrote:
This kid doesn’t sound stupid… He sounds like he has more pressing issues to contemplate than the life and times of koalas.
Posted on 24-Jul-07 at 10:34 am | Permalink
gwpriester wrote:
We’re doomed.
Posted on 24-Jul-07 at 11:03 am | Permalink
Amosj wrote:
A couple of days ago A. Sullivan linked to a list of “taboo” questions composed by Steven Pinker. Don’t misunderstand: I think a good teacher could, and should, win the debate on why we need to save pandas. But a only a bad teacher would dismiss the question as unaskable. After all, the kid did do his homework. Two drafts, even!
Posted on 25-Jul-07 at 8:56 am | Permalink
R wrote:
wild. outrageous. and from the heart.
Posted on 02-Aug-07 at 6:58 am | Permalink